Gym

 "Those who can't do anything, teach. And those who can't teach... teach gym."

Gym is possibly one of the most meaningless classes in all of school.

While, if given the right teacher, it can possess some entertainment value, that is not the case this year.

Our track is 1/4 of a mile long. Thus, 4 laps is one mile. Before starting gym each and every agonizing day, we are given the task of running 3 laps. So... 3/4 of a mile (which is apparently 1.207008 Kilometer)

Today, my friends and I ran 2 and a half of those laps, speed walking only half of one.

Upon coming back into the gym, we were informed that we had had points deducted for walking. Upon stating that gym should be about effort, and not ability, our teacher informed us that "if you'd been red in the face and breathing REAL (emphasis on real, since we WERE out of breath) hard, then I would've given you points for effort, but that's not the case."

Then, and, this is the real kicker, he pointed to a few girls who were still on their second lap, WALKING, and says "See? They're maintaining a good running pace. You could learn something from them."

My other favorite part of this story is that the year prior to this, our old gym teacher informed us "If you want to run less, take individual."

We took individual.

Laps run by those in Team Sports: 1

Laps run by those in Individual: 3

Gym teachers  = Competent.

My favorite gym teacher of all time was morbidely obese, and would yell from his rascal for us to run faster before slurping up some more of his Big Gulp. I am not making this up, but I wish I was.